Retirement today rarely happens in a single, tidy moment, especially in two-income households. More often than not, couples find themselves in staggered retirement, with one person stepping out of the workforce while the other continues working, even if that wasn’t the original plan. According to a 2024 Ameriprise study, only 11 percent of U.S. couples retire at the same time, and in more than 60 percent of households, one spouse remains employed for at least a year after the first spouse retires. [1]
For couples retiring separately, the transition can be more disruptive than expected. Routines change, expectations shift, and even the strongest bonds may feel strained. But phasing into retirement doesn’t have to be a stressful time in your life.
The key to a successful staggered retirement is approaching the challenge together, with intention and solid planning. This means clarifying your retirement timelines and why they differ, preparing emotionally for changes in roles and routines, aligning your finances with new realities, adjusting your lifestyle expectations accordingly, and seeking professional guidance from a financial advisor.
Why Retire Separately?
Couples plan ahead for a staggered retirement for smart financial reasons: to boost household income, delay tapping into savings, maintain workplace health care benefits for a partner not yet eligible for Medicare, or increase long-term Social Security benefits by having one spouse continue working while delaying claims. The main goal is to help both partners stretch resources and optimize benefits over time.[2]
Sometimes, the plan was always to retire separately from the start. We see this when one spouse has a pension, and the other doesn’t. Another common scenario is that one spouse is vying for freedom ASAP, while the other is passionate about their work.
For many couples, however, staggered retirement is more of a response to real life than a pre-choreographed plan. You might find that you’ll need to retire separately when one spouse is pushed into an earlier-than-expected retirement due to a change at work, a health challenge, or the need to care for an aging parent. In those situations, phased retirement happens more out of necessity than being the first choice.
Recent research found that 33 percent of people surveyed retired earlier than planned due to changes in their work circumstances. Another 17 percent retired due to a health issue affecting them or a loved one, 11 percent accepted an early retirement package, and four percent experienced a late-career layoff. [3]
But even when the timing feels out of your hands, it’s important to approach staggered retirement with a plan. When expectations don’t align, frustration and resentment can follow.
An advisor can help couples understand how staggered retirement affects their finances, balance competing priorities, and build a coordinated plan that supports both partners now and in the future.
Preparing Emotionally for a Staggered Retirement
When couples retire separately, the emotional shift often feels bigger than the financial one. Retirement reshapes identities, routines, expectations, and the rhythm of daily life in ways many couples don’t anticipate. Retirement is typically framed as a reward after years of work, but when one partner retires before the other, it can also bring up new challenges couples haven’t faced before.
Research on “gray divorce” points to major life transitions, such as retirement, as inflection points at which unresolved issues, misaligned expectations, and emotional distance come into sharper focus, straining even long-term, stable marriages. When one spouse retires first, the risk isn’t just retirement itself, but unspoken assumptions about time, roles, money, and togetherness. Acknowledging these risks early helps couples stay connected and proactive rather than slowly drifting apart. [4]
Setting & Managing Expectations for Couples Retiring Separately
Open conversations about identity, meaning, and what fulfillment looks like in this next phase are critical for navigating the transition together.
For the retiring spouse, leaving work might mean losing more than a paycheck. Work provides structure, social connection, and a sense of purpose. Without it, some retirees feel bored, uncertain, or insecure about how they now contribute to the household and marriage. The working spouse, still anchored in routines and deadlines, may not fully recognize the emotional weight of this shift.
Staggered retirement also creates differing daily rhythms. One spouse has flexibility and free time, while the other remains constrained by work. Household roles often shift by default, with the retired spouse taking on more tasks or offering unsolicited advice. New incongruities can lead to guilt, loneliness, or frustration on both sides, and minor annoyances may feel amplified as time spent at home increases. Revisiting expectations around responsibilities, personal space, and together time will help prevent resentment from taking root.
Emotional Foundations for Phased Retirement
Healthy adjustment requires both connection and autonomy. Each spouse should maintain individual interests, friendships, and social outlets, while also protecting shared time.
Emotions around finances, such as feelings of dependency, pressure, or responsibility, should be discussed openly and without judgment. Regular check-ins create space to talk honestly about what’s working and what isn’t. Setting boundaries, showing affection, and communicating with patience reinforces partnership during this period of significant change.
A staggered retirement doesn’t have to pull couples apart. Instead, this phase can become a foundation for a more aligned and resilient next chapter together.
Preparing Financially for a Staggered Retirement
When couples retire separately, the household’s financial picture shifts almost overnight. Income drops, spending patterns change, and familiar tax and benefit strategies may no longer apply. For many couples, this shift requires thoughtful planning for cash flow, taxes, Social Security timing, and health care costs to avoid expensive surprises.
Studies confirm that while most couples share retirement goals and trust each other with financial decisions, many haven’t agreed on how priorities could possibly shift when one partner leaves the workforce early. [5]
Financial Challenges of Couples Retiring Separately
One of the most immediate effects of staggered retirement is a drop in household income while core expenses remain largely unchanged. According to AARP, everyday costs, such as housing, utilities, and food, don’t suddenly disappear when one partner stops working, and household spending sometimes even increases as the retired spouse pursues travel, hobbies, or social activities. [6]
Together, you should revisit your spending plan to align it with new routines and identify areas that need adjustment. Start by reviewing upcoming major expenses and shared priorities, such as planned trips or home improvements. Avoid tapping too deeply into savings too early in retirement; depleting your nest egg prematurely puts long-term goals at risk. Some couples find that modest part-time work or income from a hobby helps bridge the gap without stressing cash flow or retirement portfolios.
Tax Planning, Withdrawals & Social Security in Staggered Retirement
Changes in income during staggered retirement could shift your household into a different tax bracket. In some years, that creates opportunities, like taking advantage of lower tax rates on retirement account withdrawals. But in other years, large withdrawals combined with ongoing earnings from the working spouse may push you into a higher bracket, reducing the benefit of those strategies. Coordinating IRA or 401(k) withdrawal timing to balance income needs and tax implications is an essential part of thoughtful planning.
Timing Social Security is another critical decision. Claiming benefits too early permanently reduces monthly payments, while delaying past full retirement age increases your benefit amount and can improve lifetime income. Running updated tax projections each year will help identify opportunities, such as Roth conversions or capital gains harvesting, that align with evolving income patterns. It also allows you to stress-test your plan for sequence-of-returns risk and inflation. [7]
Health Insurance, Medicare & Coverage Gaps for Couples Retiring Separately
Health insurance costs can be a significant concern when one spouse retires before age 65. If the retired partner isn’t yet eligible for Medicare, options may include coverage through the working spouse’s employer, COBRA, or a marketplace plan, each with its own cost implications. Once both spouses are on Medicare, household income influences premiums for Parts B and D, making it important to understand how income and tax planning affect these costs over time. [8]
Looking at long-term health-care needs within your financial plan, especially if medical needs might accelerate as you age, means you’re prepared for both expected and unexpected expenses without jeopardizing retirement security.
Getting Support From a Financial Advisor for Staggered Retirement
A staggered retirement adds layers of complexity, both emotional and financial, that most couples don’t anticipate. A seasoned advisor can help you navigate this transition with clarity by modeling different retirement timing scenarios and coordinating the many moving pieces: cash flow, taxes, investments, Social Security, Medicare, and long-term planning.
At Falbo Wealth Management, we serve as a neutral guide, helping couples articulate shared goals, ease tension, and make confident decisions about timing and lifestyle.
Sources:
1. https://www.ameriprise.com/binaries/content/assets/ampcom/amp_research-report.pdf
2. https://finance.yahoo.com/news/26-us-couples-think-ll-122300552.html
3. https://www.ameriprise.com/binaries/content/assets/ampcom/amp_research-report.pdf
4. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9434459/
5. https://www.ameriprise.com/binaries/content/assets/ampcom/amp_research-report.pdf
6. https://www.aarp.org/money/retirement/married-couple-split-retirement/
7. https://www.irs.gov/individuals/seniors-retirees
8. https://www.ssa.gov/benefits/medicare/medicare-premiums.html
This material has been prepared in collaboration with Crystal Marketing Solutions, LLC, and has been edited with the assistance of artificial intelligence tools. The information presented is based on sources believed to be reliable and accurate at the time of publication. This material is for educational purposes only and does not necessarily reflect the views of the author, presenter, or affiliated organizations. It should not be construed as investment, tax, legal, or other professional advice. Always consult a qualified professional regarding your specific situation before making any decisions.